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Golden Globes as much fun as getting a flu shot, but winners were deserving

I am not sure who had a worse Sunday – Chicago Bears kicker Cody Parkey or Golden Globes co-hosts Andy Samberg and Sandra Oh.

At least Parkey had a good excuse for missing a potential game-winning field goal in the Bears playoff loss to the Philadelphia Eagles. (The kick was tipped at the line by an Eagle.)

Samberg and Oh had weeks to prepare for their opening monologue with a team of writers and the best they could come up with was an anti-Ricky Gervais presentation in which they praised nominees and pretended they were insults.

It was the lamest opening monologue in recent memory.

It was more painful than thinking about all the urology jokes in “The Kominsky Method.”

It was more painfully unfunny than the later bit in which Samberg and Oh announced flu shots were being given out in the award-show tradition of giving out prizes to people in the audience.

It was so bad that it almost made me turn off the show before the first award was given out.

But I stuck it out because I have a tough job and someone has to do it.

I just reminded myself the Golden Globes are considered a joke anyway by most critics because they are voted on by 90 or so foreign journalists and only get so much attention because NBC televises them and the celebrities attending them attract a big audience. Sunday's program had an excellent 12.2 rating on WGRZ-TV (Channel 2).

Thanks to previous hosts like Ricky Gervais and Tina Fey and Amy Poehler who know how to deliver a good insult to celebrities used to getting praise, and the liquor provided at tables to nominees, the Globes usually can be counted on to be entertaining.

I was longing for Ricky, Tina and Amy after five minutes.

Thankfully, Michael Douglas won the first award for his role as an acting coach in the Netflix comedy “The Kominsky Method,” and made me laugh by using a Yiddish expression that reminded me of my late father.

“Altacockers rule,” said Douglas as he walked off stage.

It may have sounded dirty to some viewers unfamiliar with Yiddish, but altacockers generally refer to old men.

And this more-than-three-hour show was saved by altacockers and older women.

Michael Douglas, winner for best performance by an actor in a television series – musical or comedy for his role in "The Kominsky Method," gave a shoutout to altacockers. (Getty Images)

The speeches by Douglas, special award winners Jeff Bridges and Carol Burnett, “Kominsky Method” creator Chuck Lorre and Glenn Close provided most of the highlights and almost made me forget how painful the beginning of the show had been.

I didn’t think this show could go any lower than the opening and then Oh told a dirty joke in front of her parents, who were in attendance.

NBC allowed that joke but deleted expletives in speeches that apparently were the funniest parts of the show, at least when you consider audience reaction.

There was no reason to shout any expletives when it came to the vote of the 90 foreign journalists on the awards.

“The Kominsky Method” was my favorite comedy and it won as best musical or comedy TV series. Douglas won as best actor in the same category. The series was so enjoyable I plan to watch it over again.

The final season of “The Americans” was my favorite drama and it won as best TV drama.

“The Assassination of Gianni Versace: American Crime Story” won as best limited series or motion picture made for television just as it had won an Emmy. Darren Criss, who played the serial killer in the series, also deservedly won the Golden Globe after previously winning an Emmy for the same category. The series also had a local angle. It was based on a book by Maureen Orth, the widow of Tim Russert.

I didn’t love the second season of “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel” as much as I did the first season but I was happy to see Rachel Brosnahan win as best actress in a TV musical or comedy.

I thought “Escape at Dannemora” could have been done in the half the time, but Patricia Arquette deserved her award as best actress in a limited series or motion picture made for TV.

On the motion picture side, “Green Book” was my favorite film of the year and it won in the musical or comedy category. Mahershala Ali, who stars in the next edition of HBO’s “True Detective" premiering Sunday, was great in the film. He won as best supporting actor, though he could have won in the best actor comedy since his role was so prominent.

Many people were probably upset that “Bohemian Rhapsody” beat “A Star Is Born” as best dramatic picture, but I’m OK with picking it over a remake no matter how good “Star” was re-born. I also have no argument with Rami Malek winning as best actor since he deserved an award just for wearing a replica of Freddie Mercury’s teeth.

Glenn Close deserved the award as best actress in a drama for "The Wife” and delivered a great line in her speech about women like her mother deferring to men. “It was called ‘The Wife,’ which I think is why it took 14 years to be made."

Christian Bale looked and sounded like Dick Cheney in “Vice” and gave a funny, biting speech after winning as best actor that included this memorable line: “Thank you to Satan for giving me inspiration on how to play this role.” Then he joked he may play Senate majority leader Mitch McConnell next as a “charisma-free” (expletive deleted) character. At least Bale had the spirit of insult artist Ricky Gervais. He gets my vote to be the host next year.

Email: apergament@buffnews.com

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