On the topic of Amazon and its search for a city to host its planned second headquarters, at least one of the potential lures is getting salty.
An Albany Times-Union columnist recently decided that groveling was not likely to persuade the Seattle-based, online retail giant to choose the New York State capital as a second base of operations.
Instead, perhaps a heaping dose of self-deprecation, along with a little trash talking of the competition might work to give Albany leg up on contenders, such as Tucson, Ariz., or Canada’s capital city of Ottawa, Ontario, and, perhaps, even our own Queen City.
Times-Union columnist Chris Churchill pitched Albany’s 500,000-square-foot Central Warehouse as ideally suited to be adapted as new digs for Amazon’s planned second home. Even the new owner of the battered building has called it “the ugliest building ever built in the state of New York.”
Churchill expressed confidence he could be persuaded to sell it to Amazon for the right price.
After that, Churchill landed a gut punch, lambasting Tucson’s “sad attempt to mail a 21-foot cactus to Amazon’s campus in soggy Seattle,” adding, “your mayor should be arrested for plant abuse.”
Churchill also suggested Ottawa’s harsh winters should take it out of the running, a tired, but tried and true slam usually reserved for Buffalo.
As for Buffalo, he went straight for the jugular, along with its self-esteem:
“And while we admire your determination, Buffalo, you remain the Charlie Brown of cities. Even if you somehow manage to kick this football, it’s going wide right, a la Scott Norwood.”
Perhaps, a gut punch would have been preferable.