All right, class, here’s your assignment: Write a couple of believable paragraphs that include the words submarine, park, tendons, tree and maybe. Something like:
John Pawlowski just can’t stay out of the news. First, it was for the apparently suspicious habit of eating his submarine sandwich each week on the same Town of Tonawanda street, raising the suspicions of at least some neighbors and leading to stories in The Buffalo News that eventually went viral. He would park his car there just to admire a tree.
Now he’s back in the news after rupturing the quadriceps tendons in both of his legs while playing floor hockey this week. He needed surgery and won’t be able to bend either leg for about six weeks.
It just goes to show you. Something. Maybe.
Sometimes, bad juju can lead to enlightenment. So it seems for Pasqua DiGianni, the Canadian woman who forfeited a $1,400 jackpot at the Seneca Niagara Casino after violating her own self-imposed ban.
In 2015, DiGianni signed a document voluntarily barring herself from the casino, a decision she made after winning $50,000 at a slot machine, then losing most of it on subsequent trips to the casino. For her recent return, she was charged with trespassing.
Niagara Falls City Judge Robert P. Merino adjourned the case on Monday in contemplation of dismissal. He even advised her to consider speaking to a lawyer about the payout denied to her by the casino.
But DiGianni doesn’t think she’ll do that. Instead, she came up with a plan that could be worth far more than the lost $1,400: She says she’s given up gambling.
It may be the best advice she’ll ever give herself.
Who knew you could mail children? It’s apparently true, or at least it was. The National Postal Museum reports that in the earliest days of parcel post, everything from coffins to dogs and children were dropped in the mail.
Wonder if anyone who got one ever refused delivery.