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McCarthy: Visions of politics, 2016 style

’Twas Christmas ’16
And all around here,
Our readers still say
What a really weird year.

It started with Hillary
And a senator named Bernie,
Who scrapped with each other
In the Democrats’ big tourney.

The Republicans were nestled
All snug in their beds,
As visions of Jeb
Danced in their heads.

But down in Manhattan
There arose such a clatter,
’Cuz a billionaire named Trump
Was all that would matter.

He breezed through the primaries
Won the GOP nod,
And staged all those rallies
Where they thought he was God.

For once, our state mattered
In the primaries for president,
When voters cast ballots
For two New York residents.

But The Donald prevailed
Despite Hillary’s knowledge,
He knew how to score
In the Electoral College.

Now Collins! Now Langworthy!
On DiPietro! On Carl!
To Washington with Trump
And gridlock unsnarl!

Chris Collins has found
His way on to cable,
Where “spokesman for Trump”
Becomes his new label.

He now is big time
No longer an enigma,
Pretty soon he’ll be asking
For national Six Sigma.

At home all our politics
Is guarded by Preet,
When it comes to indictments
He just can’t be beat.

Last year he got Skelos
And also bagged Shelly,
He knows that in Albany
Our system is smelly.

Cuomo’s Buffalo Billion
Now lies in Preet’s sights,
For some Buffalo people
That means sleepless nights.

Now Mayor Byron Brown
Hangs his stockings with care,
On the big marble fireplace
In his second-floor lair.

A fourth term he’ll seek,
Despite Schroeder’s sniffin’,
And try for the record
Set by old Jimmy Griffin.

We break from the normal
On this Christmas Day,
To mangle our poetry
In a most awful way.

So forgive us once more
For the method we choose,
To wish Happy Christmas to all
From The Buffalo News.

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