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Off Main Street /

No taking it easy here

You can jump up and down, hoot and holler like crazy, but whatever you do, don’t send out text messages while you are watching an Eagles concert.

When the Eagles played First Niagara Center on July 18, there were several ominous, sharply worded announcements, warning people not to ruin the show by pulling out their cellphones to send texts or take pictures of the band. Security guards were watching the audience like hawks, looking for violators.

The Eagles’ lead singer, Glenn Frey, even made a point of scolding a woman in one of the front rows for sending out a text message while he was talking.

“This is our time with you,” Frey told the audience. Quite a few people in the audience applauded Frey when he made his statement. But a woman sitting in the second row remarked that, if she was willing to pay nearly $200 to hear the Eagles, she ought to be able to send a photo of the band to her friends.

Guys, remember your own words: “Take it easy.”

Surprise jumper

First the coach of the Buffalo Bills; next, the Hamburg town clerk.

Much was made out of Rex Ryan’s parachute jump last week with the U.S. Army Golden Knights at the Niagara Falls Air Base. Seems that’s becoming a trend.

Hamburg Town Clerk Cathy Rybczynski also plans to take the plunge in tandem with member of Frontier Skydivers at today’s Blast on the Beach, landing on the sand at Hamburg Town Park.

Rybczynski said that when she told her husband about the plan several weeks ago, he said, “I was infantry, so it makes sense you’d go airborne.”

Chalking it up

Call it Ham-Gogh.

Budding artists young and old can help recreate, entirely in chalk, the famous “Self-Portrait with Straw Hat” by Vincent van Gogh next week.

Anyone can go down and draw from 2 to 6 p.m. Aug. 1 during the Flavor of Hamburg Festival on Main and Buffalo streets in the Village of Hamburg. The artwork will take shape on the parking lot of the Attea & Attea building on Buffalo Street, next to Great Harvest Bread Co.

Artist Tim Cornelius has the task of directing the project. Each participant will use chalk to color in one of the 50 squares that make up the iconic painting. You don’t have to bring your own chalk, and we hear you don’t have to slice off your ear.

What’s not to like?

A local waitress took to Instagram to thank Washington Nationals outfielder Jayson Werth, whom she served at the Black Sheep on the West Side.

“Thanks Jayson Werth. You have a real cool beard and you’re real nice and I’ve been told you’re a real good baseball player,” wrote Jessica Wegrzyn, who has been in productions at the Kavinoky Theatre and the Theatre of Youth.

And the 2008 World Series winner, who will make $21.57 million this year, is a pretty good tipper, too.

Werth, who was in Buffalo with the Syracuse Chiefs, where he is on a rehabilitation stint after breaking his wrist, left a $100 tip on a $180.53 bill.

Last laugh

Imagine leaving the funeral of your son, brother and father, ready for his final trip to the cemetery, and discovering his ride is gone.

That’s what happened to the family of Philip Brown earlier this month, when someone stole the hearse from outside the church. It was shocking, said his father, David Brown, in a letter to Everybody’s Column, but it was a “welcome shock,” he said.

The strange situation interrupted the family’s grief, transforming it into laughter, something that Philip Brown, who liked telling colorful jokes, may have appreciated.

“We couldn’t help but think he enjoyed a last laugh,” David Brown wrote, adding the bizarre episode “recalls the need and the importance of laughter in life, especially in the midst of its most difficult and sad moments.”

Off Main Street is written by Barbara O’Brien, with contributions by Dan Herbeck. email: