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Friend's hubby gets friendly

Dear Abby: A friend's husband gave me a ride to the airport, and when I went to hug him goodbye as I have always done when we parted, he grabbed me by the arms and kissed me on the lips several times. It made me very uncomfortable and I don't want to see him again.

My problem is I don't know how to end my friendship with his wife. I would never tell her, and I do not wish to have this standing between us, so I'd rather just end the friendship. How should I handle this? She occasionally contacts me for lunch dates.

-- Dismayed in Manhattan

Dear Dismayed: You're lucky the wife contacts you for lunch dates only occasionally. It means she's a casual friend, which will make disengaging easier. When she calls, all you need to do is tell her you have other plans.


Boyfriend or BFF?

Dear Abby: I have been seeing "Larry" for six months, and from Day One we both agreed that we do not want to be in a relationship. I'm 29 and he's 34. But over time we have developed feelings for each other. He tells me he doesn't want to lose me, but it's hard for him to commit for fear of being hurt.

Larry talks to other women and goes out, while I have basically committed myself to him. He gets upset if I talk to another man. He says I'm his best friend and he's afraid a relationship would change that.

Neither one of us would be OK if the other started dating, but I'm sick of waiting for him to make up his mind. Should I move on?

-- In Limbo in Columbus, Ind.

Dear in Limbo: Yes, you should. But not before telling Larry exactly why, because the arrangement you have right now is unfair to you. If you don't, you and Larry could wind up being "best friends" forever and nothing more.