Dear Abby: I'm a career woman, working for a family-owned business. Last year was difficult because there have been a number of layoffs and no raises. When I had my annual review, I received an outstanding evaluation but was again told no raise would be forthcoming because business is slow.
I could understand this because of the current economy if the owners of the company weren't taking expensive vacations and buying new luxury cars.
I have a hard time accepting there's no money for raises when they spend so extravagantly. I understand it's not my business how they spend their money, but it's difficult to swallow when I feel so taken advantage of. I'm not the only one here feeling the way I do, and it's beginning to create a hostile environment. Am I wrong to feel this way?
-- Bitter in the Northeast
Dear Bitter: If your employers are claiming poverty while indulging in conspicuous consumption, your feelings are understandable. And as soon as the job market improves, I'm sure you will be only a part of the stampede of fellow employees seeking another job.
Mom in wedding party
Dear Abby: My daughter is being married in the fall and she has asked me to be her matron of honor. She has been through a lot, and I have supported her all the way. She says I am the only one who had faith in her, encouraged her and loved her no matter what.
If her dad isn't in the wedding, should I be in it?
-- Donna in South Carolina
Dear Donna: If what your daughter said is true, and you were the only one who had faith in her and loved her unconditionally, then you should accept her offer to stand with her at the altar. And yes, it has been done before.