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Waz ^, kdz?

An NCAA committee on Wednesday proposed ending a loophole in college athletics recruiting in which coaches may send recruits an unlimited number of text messages. Texting, instant messaging and other forms of electronic communication would be banned under the proposal, which the NCAA Board of Directors is expected to pass at its April 26 meeting.

Is there any chance we could outlaw text messaging and IM-ing altogether from society at large? These activities waste too much time, too many brain cells, and make my family's carbon footprint resemble Bob Lanier's old size 22 sneakers.

OK, I guess that's asking too much. The horse is out of the barn already, and it will be tough to wean our kids off their e-habits.

However, thanks to a Web site I found,, it's easy to translate English into text-speak. Having trouble reaching your teen or pre-teen? So was I, until I learned how to text them. Now, all the kids in the neighborhood know which dad is "down" with how they roll.

Below are some text messages I sent to the kids, followed by English translations. Feel free to try this at home.

ur nt gunA an R-rated moV. -- You are not going to an R-rated movie.

turn off dat iPod thng n set d table! -- Turn off that iPod thing and set the table.

no, Dad cnt gt u a set of Sabres medallions. I'm nt md of $ -- No, Dad can't get you a set of Sabres medallions. I'm not made of money.

dat Fallout Boy record rly rox. -- That Fallout Boy record really rocks.

w@ dz "explicit" mean on yr iTunes playlist? -- What does "explicit" mean on your iTunes playlist?

Shakespeare S ll dat. dude cUd brng d noyZ. -- Shakespeare is all that! The dude could bring the noise.

u cnt go 2 d danC 'til uv done yr hmwrk, dats 4 shizzle -- You can't go to the dance until you have done your homework, that's for shizzle.

dnt cry. Sanjaya wl av plenty of shO biz opertntys. -- Don't cry. Sanjaya will have plenty of show business opportunities.


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