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COME CLEAN ABOUT INTERNET LIE

Dear Ann Landers: I am a 24-year-old single woman. I recently met a man through a chat room on the Internet. I was trying to play it safe, so when he asked for my name, I gave him a fake one. When he asked for a photograph, I foolishly sent him a picture of a very good-looking friend of mine.

We have grown closer, and now, I am very attached to him. We want to meet someday soon, but I still haven't fessed up about the lies. I'm afraid if I admit what I did, he will decide I'm not trustworthy and dump me.

How can I tell him the truth without destroying a budding relationship?

-- Internet Babe in Cleveland
Dear Internet Babe: The problem with Internet relationships is they require safety measures, and your friend should understand this. Come clean now. Tell him the truth immediately and vow to play it straight from now on. Then do it.

Moving on

Dear Ann Landers: Our 25-year-old daughter, "Angela," has moved six times in the last seven years. It's always some excuse -- she can't get along with her roommate, the apartment is too hot, too cold, too close, too far, too loud and so on. Of course, when it comes time to move, she expects Mom and Dad to pick up the TV, the stereo and the furniture and take them to her new place.

I have told Angela repeatedly that she should be more careful when she selects a place to live, and frankly, I am getting too old to be lugging furniture up and down steps. Yesterday, Angela called my wife and said she had to move out immediately. She had an argument with her roommate, and they are no longer speaking.

I told my wife our "baby" must fend for herself so she can learn responsibility. My wife disagrees and says she is going to Angela's apartment tomorrow morning to help her move again. Is there anything I can do about this?

-- My Aching Back in Ohio
Dear Aching in Ohio: A good therapist might be able to figure out why Angela is so eager to throw in the towel at the first sign of trouble. Meanwhile, you are doing her no favor by jumping to her rescue every time she has a problem with a roommate. This girl needs to grow up, and the sooner the better. If your wife insists on helping with her daughter's multiple moves, tell her she's on her own.

Hairy problem

Dear Ann Landers: Some time ago, you had a letter about a grown man who let his hair grow out and his father no longer let him in the house. Our son, "Evan," is now in college, paying his own tuition and living at home. His hair has become a battleground between him and his father. His father berates him constantly because the boy refuses to get it cut. This is ruining their relationship. My husband thinks it shows a lack of respect for Evan to disregard his wishes. I could use your advice.

-- Disgusted with the Whole Situation in Nebraska
Dear Nebraska: Don't tell me parents are still fussing about their sons' hair. As long as Evan keeps his hair clean and out of other people's faces, the parents shouldn't squawk. There are too many other issues far more important. Hair is a non-issue, and should be regarded as such. Evan's dad should lay off.

Problems? Dump on Ann. Write her at The Buffalo News, P.O. Box 100, Buffalo, N.Y. 14240.

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