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OLAF FUB SEZ: It was Polish poet, author and satirist Stanislaw J. Lec (1909-1966) who campe up with, "THINK before you think." . . .

ON THIS DAY -- In 1609, Henry Hudson discovered Delaware Bay. . . . In 1774, Mother Elizabeth Ann Seton, the first American-born saint, was born in New York City. . . . In 1963, 200,000 people participating in a civil rights rally in Washington, D.C., heard the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. deliver his "I Have a Dream" speech in front of the Lincoln Memorial. . . . In 1996, the troubled 15-year mariage of Britain's Prince Charles and Princess Diana officially ended with the issuing of a divorce decree. . . .

AN OPEN HOUSE will be held from 1 to 4 p.m. Sunday at Villa Maria Infirmary, 600 Doat St., Cheektowaga, in celebration of Sister Mary Bernarda's 100th birthday.

Sister Bernarda, a Felician nun for more than 84 years, was born Sept. 2, 1898, in Whitney, Pa. She was one of 18 children. Nine of her siblings died in Poland during the disastrous flu epidemic that swept Europe and the United States during World War I.

She entered the order when she was 15 and began teaching when she was 19. She spent most of her teaching career in the Diocese of Buffalo. She recalls that in her early years of teaching, classes numbered between 80 and 100 students and ran from 8 a.m. to 4 p.m., with time out for lunch.

Unlike some of today's free-wheeling classrooms, her grade-school pupils learned not only the three R's, but discipline as well.

Sister Bernarda, noted for her excellent memory, said: "In those days, discipline prevailed. Constant emphasis was placed on morals, ethics and values." She estimated that she taught 6,000 students during her career. And she speaks with pride when she says she cannot recall ever knowing of any of her students being in newsworthy trouble. Not one. . . .

REALLY FAST FOOD -- Chris Maynard and Bill Scheller offer the perfect cuisine for folks who find themselves slaves to the road.

The two have penned "Manifold Destiny" and bill it as "the one! the only! guide to cooking on your car engine."

And that's no idle prose. Ovens and thermometers give way to odometers and internal combustion as means of cooking up such savories as "pickup ham steak," "Mom's tuna wiggle," "upper-class roadkill" and "Hyundai halibut with fennel."

These gung-ho gourmets, published by Villard Books, go the distance to explain the secrets of cooking with sturdy aluminum foil, a secure engine nook and a well-mapped itinerary.

Not-so-oddly, the Queen City's claim to gastronomic immortality, the wing, takes flight under the category of Midwestern fare and the generic title, "any-city chicken wings."

But alas, these fast-lane authors are mere novices in the art of infernal consumption. For years, Olaf's Nash (Rambler, that is) has tripped up such dishes as "chicken Gumout," "radiator ratatouille," 10w-30 beef stew and fuel-injected bratwurst.

Olaf's tips for would-be Nash-noshers: Keep your eyes on the road, steer clear of popcorn and keep plenty of antacid in the glove compartment. . . .

HAPPY BIRTHDAY -- Rosemarie Janik, Tricia Newton, Barb Waz, Dennis Griffin, Paul Bushley, Joseph M. Grisanti, Dorothy Wallum, Walter Halady, Brian M. Raab, Donald Eugene Tyes, Rick Bittner, Jim McCabe, Joan Rosenberry, Lynn Lilga, Kenneth M. O'Leary, John R. Sullivan, Emily Newell, Bill Dennies, Lynn Lilga, Irish Legierski, Ed Kerber, Sue Vaccaro, Lois Norman, Chet Kruk, Shannon Ring, Mark Hilger, Hope Cheney, Marcy Reansnyder.

SATURDAY -- Betty Vail, Patrick Higgins, Sue Derylak, Shane Currey Jr., Dorothy Maxwell, Peter Klaich, Rose Fatta, Vince Edbauer, Rich Cera, Millie Barone, Millie Barone, Barb Meyers, Sister Nancy Walsh, Bernie Pendrys, Bob Mallette, Helen Lindquist, Annette Henninger, John Vaccaro, John Kipp, Peg Krueger, Liam Caulfield, Jim McCune, Barbara McMullen.

AND SUNDAY -- Lizzy Payne, Marielle DiCesare, Jerry Ciambor Jr., Mary Peer, Beverly McCormick, Helen Anzalone, Betty Kuhn, Jim Tyler, Jo Honecker, Terry Coffta, Adrianne Robertson, Bob Lipinczyk, Mark Pollinger, Lucielle Comella, Christopher Golas, Jim Urban, Rachel Lyn Matecki, Allen Penfield Sr., Minnie Willis, Esther Baumis, Marge Beach, Karen O'Leary, Ronnie Chader, Ray Garbowski, Mary Matlock, Jean Hauser, Peg Marcoux, Jack Conway, Donovan Codair, Helen Laettner, Sarah Butera.

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