Dear Abby: I have been married almost four years. Recently I had some medical problems that were my wake-up call. I’m fine now, but I no longer am willing to wait for “someday.”
I decided to try some new hobbies, one of which is skydiving. When I asked my husband what he thought, his response was, “I’m not spending the day just to see you jump out of an airplane.” Talk about disappointing!
I know he doesn’t want to go skydiving, but all I wanted was his support, and maybe someone to take a video or pictures.
His response has left me wondering about a lot of things. I have had enough of his negativity. Now I’m not sure where I go from here.
– Disappointed in San Diego
Dear Disappointed: I hope you realize this letter isn’t about skydiving, but your husband’s refusal to help you celebrate your new lease on life.
A successful marriage is one in which a couple ideally grows TOGETHER. If your husband is unwilling or unable to do that, then “where you go from here” is to first ask him if he’s willing to talk to a marriage counselor with you. If he’s not, then schedule some sessions for yourself with a licensed professional and discuss the circumstances that led to your “wake-up call.” It will help you rationally – and unemotionally – decide how best to enjoy this gift of life you have been given.
A beef about cellphone use
Dear Abby: You have addressed cellphone etiquette in your column before, but in this day and age it bears repeating.
We attended a meeting for parents and students last night at our child’s high school. Inevitably, a cellphone rang, which can happen to anyone. The ring was quickly silenced.
A few minutes later, another cellphone started ringing. Rather than mute it, the parent answered it and proceeded to have a conversation during the meeting while a school staff person was making a presentation. It wasn’t a long conversation, but it wasn’t quiet either. The parent was sitting in the back row – he could easily have slipped out to have this “important” conversation.
Thanks for letting me vent. It was extremely annoying and rude. Now I know why his son has no common sense.
– Annoyed in Iowa
Dear Annoyed: At most events an announcement is made beforehand that cellphones should be turned off. If there is an interruption, an experienced speaker will pause until the interruption ceases. From your letter, I assume that isn’t what happened last night.
Children learn manners and common sense by watching their parents. If consideration for others isn’t modeled for them, they don’t learn it.