Dear Abby: Should I or shouldn’t I tell my boss that more than a few people have come to me asking if he is fooling around with a young woman here in the office?
He is married; she is not. They spend a lot of time together “visiting,” laughing and obviously flirting. They have also been seen coming and going together, having lunch together every day, etc.
My reaction is that whether they are or aren’t, it isn’t my business. A little voice keeps telling me that, as his personal secretary, he may want to be made aware that people are talking about him behind his back, and I do feel protective and a sense of loyalty to him. Understand that I do not want to discuss it with him, have verification, denial or anything else – only to give him the information.
– Vascillating in Ohio
Dear Vascillating: If there is anything going on in your employer’s business that distracts from the work his employees are doing, he should be made aware.
The daily stress
Dear Abby: My husband and I love each other and have three beautiful children, but we struggle in our marriage because of the stress of daily life. Lack of money has taken a toll. Sometimes we both work two jobs. Other times we find ourselves faced with difficult choices – like whether to buy groceries, or pay the electric bill or the mortgage. (We often can’t do all three.)
I know we’re not the only family in this situation. You often advise people to seek guidance from a professional counselor. Can you share any resources for those of us who do not have the money or the insurance coverage to pay for counseling?
– Holding On in Arkansas
Dear Holding On: You are far from the only family who is trying to cope with little money and difficulty finding steady work. Many thousands of families are in the same situation, and it is stressful for marriages and relationships.
Because you are unable to afford a private therapist, contact your county department of mental health and ask what services are available for people with limited resources. The psychology department at your nearest college or university may also be able to help during this difficult time.
Dear Abby: If you are divorced from your wife, do her parents remain your in-laws? This is to settle a disagreement.
– Sharon in Texas
Dear Sharon: Legally, no. But relationships are not always based on legality. Sometimes divorced couples remain extended family members, particularly if there are children involved.