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Five Spot / Quick hitters on the light side

NOT READY FOR THE SHOW

Big-league thieves? Far from it.

Police in La Mesa, Calif., had no problem apprehending four people -- a man, two women and a teenage girl -- suspected of ransacking a Little League concession stand, The San Diego Union-Tribune reported. All they had to do was follow the trail of cookie and candy wrappers from the shack to the overly hungry suspects' location.

WILL BAT FOR FOOD

St. Louis is the country's No. 1 city for cheapskates, in the estimation of Kiplinger magazine.

"No kidding," said one Albert Pujols apologist. "Can you believe they only offered him $23 million a year to play there?"

SPONSORED BY DENNY'S

Here's one LPGA prospect with grand slam written all over her: Alabama star Brooke Pancake.

UPON FURTHER REVIEW

With negotiations going nowhere, the NFL has locked out its game officials. So which is now the most fearsome sight in football: a 4-3 defense with Ray Lewis in the middle, or a picket line headed up by Ed Hochuli?

WITHDRAWAL PAINS

Running back Herschel Sims has been kicked off the Oklahoma State football team for allegedly taking $700 from a teammate's bank account. Probably not what his coaches had in mind when they described him as a money player.

-- Dwight Perry, The Seattle Times