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Letter gives hope to birth moms

Dear Abby: As a birth mother, I must respond to the letter from "Her Thankful Son" (Dec. 12). Nearly 26 years ago, I gave up my own son for adoption. It was the most devastatingly painful thing I have ever had to do. But I loved him enough to let him go because I was in no position to raise him myself.

To the young man who wrote you, I say: "Thank you" -- from me and all the birth mothers who carry holes in our hearts from having to let our children go on to better lives without us. My greatest fear was always that my son would end up hating me and not understand why I let him go. This man's letter has given me hope.

-- Wendy in Delaware

Dear Wendy: "Her Thankful Son" wrote an open letter to his unknown biological mom, expressing gratitude for the life his adoptive parents have provided. His letter resonated with many of my readers whose lives have been touched by adoption. Read on:

Dear Abby: When I read the letter from "Thankful Son," I felt a sense of relief. I had a son when I was 16 and placed him for adoption because I knew I couldn't give him the life he deserved. I was determined that his adoption would not be in vain. I consider myself to be a better mom now because of him.

Reading "Thankful's" letter comforted me. If it is God's will, I will meet my son one day. I feel he will be proud of me for making something of myself and giving him the opportunity for a successful life.

-- Brenda in Florida

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Dear Abby: I also am an adopted child. From the time I was told at age 7, I wondered who my birth mother was and went through phases of anger and depression. I was blinded by my own ego and did not consider anything about HER life.

With help from my adoptive mom and a state agency, I got the opportunity to meet her. Meeting my birth mom and three younger brothers and sister was a very emotional moment for me, and I cherish it to this day.

-- Jay in Maryland

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