Dear Abby: My 16-year-old daughter went to a party at a frat house where she was given a great deal to drink. Feeling "woozy," she went outside. One of the "boys" she had been talking to went with her and suggested she go back to his room to lie down. She had known this fellow before that night and trusted him. She was drunk, and he had sex with her. It was her first time. She claims she tried to make him stop, but he wouldn't, and she couldn't make him.
Shouldn't the young man be punished in some way?
-- Confused in Virginia
Dear Confused: You're darn right it was date rape. And the "something" you should do is call the nearest rape crisis center and get help for your daughter. You should also inform the police. I'm sure they'll be interested to know that minors are being given alcohol and taken advantage of at that fraternity house, as well as the name of the man who assaulted your daughter. You're absolutely correct that he's likely to do it again.
A ladies' man
Dear Abby: I have been dating "Howie" for a year. I love him and want to spend my life with him, but there's a problem. Women are attracted to Howie like bees to honey. I have seen this with my own eyes. Women come on to him even though he tells them he's in a serious relationship. Should I look the other way when they start up? Yes, Howie does talk to them, but he is just a friendly guy.
I don't want to lose my boyfriend over this, but it's really starting to bother me. How should I handle it?
-- Uncomfortable in Florida
Dear Uncomfortable: If you and Howie didn't have something special, you wouldn't have lasted as a couple. Short of throwing a bag over your boyfriend's head, there is no way to make him less attractive. However, if your "friendly guy" leaves you to fend for yourself all evening, that's considered bad manners -- and you would be within your rights to let him know it.
Battle over china
Dear Abby: I recently went through a difficult two-year divorce from "Jayson" after 10 years of marriage. My former mother-in-law, "Violet," now insists that I return the china that Jayson and I received during the marriage. I always thought a gift was just that -- a gift.
I have informed Jayson and his mother-from-hell that the china is boxed and in storage, and that I'm saving it for our son. Am I wrong?
-- Furious in Virginia
Dear Furious: When your son and his future bride are ready to set up a household, they'll want to select their own china. Of this you can be sure. If the china has been in your husband's family for generations, return it. If that's not the case, offer to let your former mother-in-law BUY it back.