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HUNTERS SAFE UNTIL DEER LEARN TO PARALLEL PARK

This is in reference to a letter recently printed in this column in which its author wistfully wished that deer could kill hunters, tie them to their cars, and put them on ice for the winter.

We were so taken with the obvious compassion of this woman and the Disney-like quality of her fantasy that we briefly mulled over the probability that such events could ever occur. We concluded that, given the intellectual and anatomical limitations of these animals and the fact that learning to parallel park is a daunting task even for humans, we hunters can safely put off buying those bulletproof vests for at least another 500 million years.

WILLIAM SHAVER
THOMAS DiGATI
Cheektowaga

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